Nineteen years after I surrendered that last five percent to do whatever God wanted me to do and go wherever He wanted me to go, I surrendered again. This time not just to do what God wanted me to do, but to be who God created me to be—to be true, to step into my identity of who I am in Christ.

Being is so much different than doing, and so much more difficult. Being takes discipline; it takes training. For instance, being totally honest and totally kind at the same time doesn’t come naturally. It’s work. Hard work. It’s putting boundaries in place and letting your “yes be yes” and your “no be no,” so that what we say with our lips is consistent with what we feel in our heart.

Jesus lived this way. Peter described Him saying that no deceit was found in His mouth. What He felt, He spoke and what He spoke, He felt. Yet, it was never from a place of hate, but of love. Love for God and love for others.

Believing in Jesus isn’t the same as learning to be like Jesus. Dallas Willard says if we want to be like Jesus, then we have to learn to live like Him. We have to do the things Jesus did. That means training our body to respond as He responded.

The practices we put into place to train our body to do what doesn’t come naturally are called disciplines. And when they relate to learning to live like Jesus and in God’s kingdom, they are called spiritual disciplines. Our aim is not heart formation, but heart transformation.

It’s all about learning to be—from a place of love.

“I discipline my body like an athlete, training it to do what it should. Otherwise, I fear that after preaching to others, I myself might be disqualified” 1 Cor 9:27.

The last six weeks have left me thinking a lot about this period of seclusion, especially as I hear our lives will be different when it ends. Our society will be different. Our culture will be changed. But a new culture is created by individuals, so my question is, “Will I be different?” Is this time in seclusion calling me to make any changes in my own life?

Before Moses ever led the Israelites into the wilderness, he had his own 40 years of seclusion in the land of Midian. He had fled there after killing an Egyptian for beating a Hebrew slave, hoping to hide and avoid trouble, much the same way we ran to our homes in March. Moses entered Midian as an eager-to-take-charge Egyptian and later emerged as a staff-carrying shepherd.

This time in seclusion was necessary for God to make monumental shifts in Moses. The first shift was from the production-oriented life of an Egyptian to the unhurried pace of a shepherd. Even Jesus as the Good Shepherd never hurried. God moves at an unhurried pace. Yet for most of us, our lives are quite the opposite. We are driven by hurry.

During the month of April, God initiated this same shift in my life as well; moving me from a hurried to an unhurried pace. But before you can move to where you want to be, you have to understand where you are. So, God began showing me I hurried not only my days, but my nights as well. From the moment I got up until I rose again the next morning, I hurried. Getting ready, getting things done and even going to bed were all hurry-driven. We all have natural rhythms, and I was totally ignoring mine.

As I set about understanding my natural rhythms, I learned I have three basic rhythms that give formation to my days and nights. My sleeping rhythm, my ramping up rhythm and my rhythm of ramping down. All of these are crucial and more important than I imagined as God is moving me from a hurried to an unhurried pace.

Sleep is fundamental to everything in life. As I learned from pastor and author, Michael Breen, we don’t work to rest, but we rest to work. I have learned during this seclusion that my body needs seven hours of sleep to rest well. I always tried to pretend I could get by with four to six hours, but the fact is I’m older now and need more sleep. Actually, I have probably always needed more, but forced myself to get by on less. Now I am sleeping more and find it easier to be more at rest in the daytime, as well.
My Sleeping Rhythm: Seven hours to rest well.

During this seclusion, I have kept my morning routine of showering, putting on makeup and getting dressed for work (a nice shirt and leggings every day—just because I can) to understand how long the physical act of getting ready takes. I finally accepted it takes me an hour. It. Just. Does. No matter how much I thought I could do it in a half-hour, when I was finally able to move about at an unhurried pace while listening to my morning podcasts, it‘s been an hour every time. And in not hurrying at this more even pace, I realize I actually enjoy putting on makeup and drying my hair, instead of thinking it to be very monotonous as previously professed.
My Ramping-Up Rhythm: One hour to get ready for my day.

Over this last month, I have also learned the importance of slowing down before bed. Like ramping up, I have finally accepted the need to give myself an hour to ramp down. The tasks of that hour include the normal brushing teeth and washing face, but they also need to include solitary time with music or a good book. The music calls to my creative side and gives expression to the dancer within. (Beginning ballet at age five and dancing for the next fourteen years, it’s always been “my sport.”) The other activity I enjoyed when I wasn’t dancing was reading. I was a voracious reader and still am. Both of these bring a stillness to my soul and a quiet to my thoughts.
My Ramping Down Rhythm: One hour to slow down from my day.
 
I have learned I hurried because I didn’t accept my natural basic rhythms. If I didn’t plan for my ramping down, it would still take the same amount of time to slow down. However, in order to compensate, I would either deprive my body of much-needed sleep, which would leave me operating at a deficit the next day, or I would sleep in and be rushed in preparing for the day. Days turn into months and months turn into years. We can see why it took Moses 40 years to be transformed.

Shifting to an unhurried pace wasn’t the end for Moses, and it’s not for me either. It’s just the beginning. There was so much more Moses had to unlearn and learn in seclusion. This next month may prove to be very transformational as this next shift takes me, like Moses, into long ignored territory. More on that later.

In the meantime, I would like to encourage you to start exploring the shifts God has started revealing to you during your time of seclusion. Share with me if you will.

Many blessings,
Katie

This morning my mind is still fixed on a question my small group asked last week. “Doesn’t the word immediately contradict the phrase fighting hurry?” I had just told our group about a podcast series I’ve been listening to called “Fight Hustle, End Hurry” and shared that I also recently discovered in the first chapter of Mark, he uses the word immediately ten times. I love questions that make you pause for thought. After thinking on this, I realize it doesn’t contradict it at all. 

Immediately is actually a key word that can unlock one of the main reasons why we hurry. We hurry because we don’t have enough time. And usually we don’t have enough time because we didn’t do something we needed to do when we needed to do it. We procrastinated. Most people who procrastinate are very busy people. We are just busy with the wrong stuff.

Instead of immediately doing what really needs to be done when it needs to be done, we focus our attention on tasks of lower priority, using them as escapist behaviors. Then when it almost becomes too late to accomplish those things which are most important, we hurry to complete them, often rushing around like crazy people. (And making the people around us crazy as well!)

I have discovered one of the main underlying reasons for procrastination is fear. Not the kind of fear you experience when there is physical danger; that is a healthy fear your mind initiates to keep you safe.

The fear I’m referring to is that of getting it wrong or not doing it perfectly the first time. Or the fear of failing and the embarrassment that accompanies it. Perhaps there is even fear of succeeding and not knowing what to do next. Fear of criticism, often from myself or others. Fear of rejection, of not living up to expectations—both mine and from others. And then there is the fear of the unknown. It can stall us every time. There are so many different ways fear can be a motivator to our actions or inaction. Fear is a small word, but it can have a big impact.

It would be great if we could say, “Just don’t procrastinate.” But it’s not that easy. Not only because it could mean we have to stop and acknowledge the fear, which often takes time and the help of others, but it’s actually hard to break the behavior of procrastination because we are accustomed to the hurry. Our bodies begin to crave the “rush” we get from the rush. We are addicted to hurry.

There are groups to help with most addictions, and there is probably one for those addicted to hurry. If there isn’t, maybe there should be. But in lieu of going to a group or starting one, I have found Mark’s word immediately to be most beneficial. 

I have discovered the word immediately actually displaces the fear. It doesn’t necessarily get rid of it, but it renders it ineffective. It takes the fear captive by giving me something else to focus on. When I reflect on the word immediately, it prompts me not to put off, but to step into action — to begin to develop a life of responsive obedience. It makes me stop and ask the Lord, “What really needs to be done right now?” and then practice submitting as the Spirit redirects my thoughts to that which is most important and of highest priority. Immediately is a word God uses to reorder our steps. Now. Not two days or two hours from now, but now.

When we respond immediately to that which is of highest priority, it starts to eliminate procrastination, hurry and rushing in our lives. Soon our rhythm begins to change as we experience the peace of this new pace, and our bodies start rejecting hurry instead of craving it. Before long, we begin to feel very uncomfortable with the thought of hurry and at odds with the stress it causes and the physical ailments that ensue.

Without even realizing it has happened, we have experienced a paradigm shift called transformation. By refocusing our thoughts and responding to the Spirit’s promptings, not only have our actions changed but our desires as well. We have moved from procrastination to peace, from chaos to calm, all because of one word, God’s word - Immediately.

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Katie Harding serves as the Founder/Director of NorthStar Women's Network and as Associate Director of NorthStar Church Network.